Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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