Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
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