I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
