He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
If I die, sorry about rent.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
