How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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