that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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