Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
