Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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