More tranny stories later!
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
