me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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