I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize