my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize