We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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