i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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