okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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