my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.