i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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