Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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