Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
