Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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