He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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