Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
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