yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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