Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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