Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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