You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
