so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Shame - the story of my life.
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