:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Just high enough for therapy.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Damn victory sex feels great
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize