Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
