Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
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