Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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