Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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