i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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