I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
