I just saw a hot homeless man
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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