i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
