Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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