I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
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