Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Thank you for not boning my boss.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
