i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
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Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
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