my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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