Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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