i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
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