i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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