How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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