she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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