Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
