thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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