when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
