I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
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I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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